"Fight me!" a site or app for combative individuals wanting to change
Contrived _voiceMar 21, 2022
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An app that intentionally creates a toxic environment so that people can work through their toxic traits without hurting anyone.
Why?
Do you struggle with needless combativeness? Is your first impulse to shout your way through every disagreement? Is it straining your relationships? Then this is the app for you. Practice talking to actual aggressive people to help you learn how to deal calmly with disagreement.
Similarly, Do you think you are too easily provoked? Would you like to practice facing criticism in a safe environment? Then once again, this is for you.
Do you also find joy in egging people on? Does aggravating people get your blood pumping? Do you hate how you do it to those close to you and end up ruining things for yourself? Well here's a group of people who want you to upset them. get the app and upset people to your hearts content.
I think it could also be an aid alongside therapy or anger management classes. A place to practice tecniques for self discipline.
How it works
You just log in annonymously and try to talk to people about things that are passionate to you. religion ,politics and personal values seem like a good place to start since although they mean everything to you, They are absolutely worthless to someone else.
Relevant research
Why are some people more combative than others? I found four reasons and how this system could help them
Freud's theory on psychology points to an instincual desire for self preservation as a cause for heightened agression. In that case, exposing yourself to agression that you know can't hurt you would normalize it consequently removing the need for you to act agressively.
A second cause is exposure to violence from a young age. This could be in the form of either constant family conflict, a neighbourhood where you had to be tough to survive or even bullying and harrassment. Growing up in such situations conditions one to react agressively in preparation for an attack that may not even be coming. And since your brain is already used to being under attack, when an attack doesn't come one is liable to start conflict just to feel as if things are normal . Again, exposure to similar agression online might provoke some internal reflection or at least allow someone to wear themselves out without bringing it into their personal lives.
Another cause is low impulse control and the only way to fix this one is practice, The more arguments you get into , the more chances you have to see how you react and how you can improve.
The final reason is low conditionability . This just means you have a lower ability to comply and learn the rules of society. You therefore find it harder to see the other side of the argument. In such a situation, seeking proffesional help is advised after which you could use the app to help yourself learn to accept the logic of others.
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General comments
Michaela D3 years ago
What an explosive mix! If you have combative people provoking each other then they will just fight, and this will only cultivate their aggressiveness. The more often they become aggressive the more their aggressiveness threshold will lower. And if they are provoked in other situations, aggressiveness will be their default response.
If someone wants to be calmer, it's better to be around calm people.
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Contrived _voice3 years ago
Michaela D It is better to be a soldier in a flower garden than a gardener on a battlefield. Everyone at some point will encounter aggression directed towards them. I just want a way to be able to expose yourself to that aggression pre-emptively so that you train yourself to deal with it calmly. Exposing yourself to agression In real life and reacting explosively could lead to you getting punched or stabbed or something like that. Here you don't have to worry about that, you can try as many times as you need to master calmness.
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Goran Radanovic3 years ago
I'm not sure I understood this well. If you're aggressive, do you use this site to vent your anger on someone else? Or do you try to be nice to them? I think you're insinuating the latter.
I can understand if a furious person would want to use someone as a verbal punching bag. If you had such a platform, how do you limit how verbally abusive a person can be or are there no limits? Also, who would be on the receiving end? Better yet, who would want to be on the receiving end of an outrage?
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Contrived _voice3 years ago
Goran Radanovic yes, the latter but for a good reason. The only way to train yourself in facing adversity is to face adversity, No? And I know they are people who genuinely enjoy giving others a hard time, right? So why not just join the two sides, the ones that want an outlet for their repressed rage and the ones that want to experience that rage so as to practice dealing with it positively in their own lives.
As for limits, you could put a classic video game hardness option. Easy is basic micro-aggression, medium would be general scathing remarks sort of like the 'roast me!' level. Hard would then be criticism directed towards things you are insecure about or that mean something to you.
The question of who would be on the receiving end is great too. There is a discord server with over 80,000 members where you post your art and people ruthlessly critique it. It's supposed to help you prepare yourself mentally before posting publicly. The Reddit subreddit "Roast me" has 2.2 million subscribers. I watched it for 4 days and at any given moment there were never less than 200 people online. So clearly people want to feel attacked but in a controlled environment.
Personally, I think it's commendable to look to criticism for self-improvement and this idea would create an environment for that.
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Please leave the feedback on this idea